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SELF-Therapy For People Who ENJOY Learning About Themselves!

The Basics #2:
Your Natural Feelings

What every eight-year-old should know
and most adults have never been taught
about the emotions that run our lives.

THE NATURAL, REAL FEELINGS

Feelings that start in our senses are natural responses to the real world.

When we notice real anger, or sadness, or scare,
we notice that something is wrong in our lives.

When we notice real joy or excitement
we notice that something is right in our lives.

Natural feelings are always trustable.
Learn what they are saying to you.
Use them well.

TYPES OF FEELINGS

There are five natural and necessary feelings:
Sad, Mad, Glad, Scared and Excited.

There are many other unnatural and unnecessary feelings
- and all of them cause problems.
Guilt, shame, and imagined fear
are by far the most common and troublesome of these.
("The Basics #3" is about these.)

THREE HUGE QUESTIONS THAT AFFECT OUR FEELINGS

When any feeling starts we are immediately faced with three huge questions
- and we tend to automatically answer them in less than a second:

1) Will you admit to yourself what you are feeling?
If you don't, you'll feel "out of touch" or "crazy" or uncentered.

2) Will you express the feeling either alone or with someone else?
If you don't, you are giving up the chance for relief.

3) Will you take action to improve things?
If you don't, you are giving up the chance to improve your future.

When we are having problems,
we need to slow down this automatic process
so that it takes longer than a second or two.
This will allow us to think through each step
instead of relying on old habits.

THE FIVE NATURAL FEELINGS
Use this information so you will always know what you want and feel.

THE FEELING:	WHEN YOU FEEL IT:	WHAT TO DO FIRST:	WHAT TO DO NEXT:
SADNESS	When you've LOST something, or when something important is MISSING from your life.	Feel it through thoroughly, to notice how important the loss was.	Work to replace what you've lost or what is missing.
ANGER / "MAD"	When there is a BLOCK between you and what you want.	Feel it through thoroughly, to notice how powerful you are.	Work toward getting past the block powerfully, wisely, and safely.
FEAR / SCARED	When your EXISTENCE is threatened.	Feel it immediately - in a second or less - and notice the danger.	Tune into your senses (what you see, hear, smell, taste or feel in your body) and protect yourself!
EXCITEMENT	When you are ON YOUR WAY to something you want.	Feel it through thoroughly, to notice how good you feel about what's coming.	Enjoy it for the fun of it!
JOY	When You've GOT What You Want.	Feel it through thoroughly, so you notice how happy you are and how good you are at getting what you want.	Enjoy it for the fun of it!

HOW TO FIND EACH FEELING IN YOUR BODY

1st	Remember a time when you felt each feeling very strongly.
2nd	Recall what was going on when you felt the feeling so strongly. Remember it in enough detail so that you actually start to feel the feeling again.
3rd	Notice where, in your body, you feel each emotion. (Find your "sad spot," your "angry spot," etc.)
4th	Describe what you feel in your body. Use adjectives like tight, weak, empty, heavy, light, etc.
5th	REMEMBER what you learn by doing this. Do this exercise over a few times if needed.

You will need this information to know
who you are and what you want
and to make every decision you will ever make.